Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Booooooo-Ya

Mad props to the king of all blogs, The Big Lead for linking us once again yesterday. It was my Gossip Girl vs. The O.C. conversation that did it. Whatever dude, anything that gets us more pub is good by me. We had our alltime best 1104 hits yesterday. Lets keep that momentum going. There are two way I know to do that. 1. Hot Chicks. 2. Making fun of people. We will go with #2 right now.

The Big Lead had a column today talking about
just how bad Emmitt Smith is on TV. That got us thinking. Who are our least favorite people on sports TV today abd why do we feel the way we do. Time for the list technique.

1. Stuart Scott - The guy puts the "B" in Buffoon. Is there anything less fresh than his awful catch phrases like "hater in the house" and "cooler than the other side of the pillow?" The suits are bad, the glasses are worse. Watching Stu-ya with Emmitt Smith and Steve Young live at the Monday Night location is train wreck TV at its finest. How he has stayed on ESPN this long is a complete mystery. Sports Centers with him are unwatchable.

2. Joe Morgan - Wins the Cal Ripken award as the single most overrated sports color man in history. Count how many times he repeats himself during a game. Here is a vintage Morgan take: See, that pitch was a sliiiiiiider, because his out-pitch is a sliiiiider, so he decided now was the time to throw a sliiiiiiiider, which is his best pitch." John Miller has been carrying him for years.

3. Stephen A. Smith - Someone, anyone, please explain to me why ESPN thinks this guy is a talent. Because he talks fast? Because he says "the bottom line" a lot? Because he was once the link to Allen Iverson in Philly? The one-time Larry Brown mouth-piece has lost all credibility since his quick rise and even quicker fall at the worldwide leader. The worst show in ESPN history (next to Bonds on Bonds) has to be Quite Frankly. What a joke! Screamin A. must go.

4. Chris Berman - You have to give credit to him as being the original and longest lasting guy at ESPN. That said, talk about someone who's schtick is as tired as his Green Jacket he wears during baseball season. The schwam? Old bit. Nicknames for players? great in the late 80's and early 90's, except its 2007. Things you can count on: Death, taxes, and Chris Berman quoting Maggie Mae at the end of September and The Boys of Summer at the end of August. But mad props to the infamous "your with me, Leather" story. Stuff of legend.

5. Fred McLeod - Nationally, he isn't known, but he is the Cleveland Cavaliers TV play by play man. This is a guy who left Detroit with a reputation of being a homer. It was well deserved. You would think Lebron James is fouled on every play and never walks. He is ridiculously excitable and equally as cheesy. In the second quarter of Sunday night's Cavs/Suns game, Freddy boy watched Steve Nash travel and screamed "he shuffled the shoes!" Look up cheese-dick in the dictionary and there's a picture of him.

6. Chip Carey - The man dubbed by my brother "Cheesy Cheerleader Chip" has gladly taken advantage of a career essentially built on being the grandson of Harry and the son of Skip. His work in the AL division series was panned brilliantly by the
New York Times' Richard Sandomir for his lack of knowledge and stretching of the truth. You would have though he was the Yankees announcer that series. Long before that, he was a homer for the Braves, a homer for the Cubs, and now back to being a homer for the Braves.

7. William C. Rhoden - Ok, he's not really a TV personality, but he has spent years on ESPN's the Sports Reporters. Plain and simple, the guy is a reverse racist who takes the African-American side of every story. Nobody loves bringing the race card up more than Bill. Only he could make Mike Lupica seem like a pleasure to be around.

8. Skip Bayless - ESPN did its best to phase him out, you only see him now on ESPN's first take (which has less viewers as Quite Frankly did) and First and Ten. There is nobody more outlandish and ridiculous. He is a classic local sports talk radio kind of guy. he says things just to be outrageous to see if anyone cares. Unfortunately for the Skipper, nobody does.

1 comment:

Soonerboy said...

Hey Bayless, yea, Missouri is so much better since they played Oklahoma the first time, they have matured so much. You should have gone to Norman and looked at some of the tape and defensive schemes like your colleague did last week. Find something else to commentate about, because you don't know college football, especially the Big XII.